I love beer. I love beer a lot. I love all kinds of beer. I love reading about it, learning about it, and discovering new kinds of it. Sweet libations.
I love my girlfriend Sarah too. I love Sarah a lot. I love everything about her. I love that, after over a year.5, I am still learning and discovering things about her. I love that I DON'T have to read about her. Like in a newspaper, for cutting down trees in a preserved national park with dead baby seals. Or, her name on some dude's infinitely bigger then myself bicep, even though "he's just a good friend". Sweet love of my life.
Without getting to personal here, blog, with my one reader, Sarah. (Hey boo! :-D) Another thing I love about my girlfriend, is the way she's put together. Ya know, she looks good naked.
And there's the dilemma. I'm not going to stop drinking beer. And my girlfriend isn't going to stop looking good naked. I'm supposed to be her young piece of ass. However I'm almost 24, the days of putting whatever I want in my body, with no repercussions, are long gone.
I believe the odds were stacked against me from day one. Woman's bodies are just beautiful. There curvaceous splendor. Everything has a home, proportioned, and where it should be. A guy, no matter how much of an Adonis he may be, always has that one thing to muck it up. Forget how cut he is. Pretend he hasn't had laser surgery removing all the hair from his chest. No matter how good he looks naked, your eyes are always going to be drawn down. And then...
BLAM! PENIS! Just kind of hanging there. Pathetically. The testicals cowering behind the scenes. It doesn't belong. It's just there. Like it was stuck on last minute by the maker. "Oh shit, they might want to reproduce? Stick this excess here. Problem solved." Sure it's practical, but the aesthetics were clearly a non-issue.
Moral of the story: I'm going to get a gym membership. I'm not trying to be the peak of physical fitness. I just need to cancel out some of the hops.
Menace
12 years ago
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